By John Amodeo

ISBN-10: 083563082X

ISBN-13: 9780835630825

The hunt for internal peace and the heart’s hope for romance usually look like irreconcilable goals. religious lecturers say that love seduces us clear of religious development, whereas psychologists argue that love’s juiciness is what lifestyles is set; meditation is navel-gazing.

Reconciling those opposites, John Amodeo indicates how spirituality and colourful relationships are exact. He says that Buddha’s notion of the basis of ache is misunderstood. it's not hope that factors discomfort; wish is the fireplace that springs from the fundamental lifestyles strength. Drawing upon the technology of attachment idea, Amodeo illuminates how the basis of our ache is disconnection from ourselves and others, that's fueled by way of clinging to what doesn't serve us.

In a conversational tone, Amodeo offers courting as sacred adventure. He teaches how one can welcome hope mindfully instead of suppress it and the way to beat worry of failure in bearing on. He additionally discusses meditation as self-intimacy and maintaining ourselves with loving-kindness. finally, he explores the position of group in non secular awakening and the problem of whom to trust—our guru or ourselves?

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Additional info for Dancing with Fire: A Mindful Way to Loving Relationships

Example text

Bruner argues that the self has to be seen as `distributed': made up of many daily practices such as people's work, friendships, writing, letters, diaries and daily communications, in locations well beyond the boundary of their physical bodies (Bruner 1990). Individuals are social beings, who use socially developed resources in producing their own communications and understandings. In this sense society and individual are the same thing, viewed from a different angle (Burkitt 1991). In arguing that the individual and the social cannot be separated, Robert Connell (1987) maintains that there is no such thing as individual practice, there is only collective practice: A personal life is a path through a ®eld of practices which are following a range of collective logics and responding to a range of structural conditions which routinely intersect and often contradict each other.

At no point do women know for sure that they will not marry in the future ± as long as there is the hope of marriage, there is the pain of ambiguity (Lewis and Moon 1997: 126). There is also the loss of previous relationships. Lewis and Moon (1997) report that the women in their study wanted certainty, rather than the pain of ambiguity. With the certainty that they would not meet a man, they would be able to get on with their lives. Yet some uncertainty would seem to be part of the human condition.

Marcelle Clements (1998), for instance, presents clusters of excerpts edited down and organized into themes, preceded by an introduction in which she says she attempts less to answer the questions raised by respondents than to offer a parallel commentary. The result is hard to make sense of or evaluate, with very scanty descriptions of each speaker, which do little to locate them in the reader's mind. Tuula Gordon (1994) adopts a more conventionally academic ethnographic approach. Her theoretical discussion is illustrated by quotations from her respondents, organized in thematic chapters.

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